easter thoughts…

Christianity lavishly celebrates Easter as the supreme Feast of Life.

Many societies also hold Easter as a Feast of Life.

After all, it is Spring!

new clothes,

special meals,

families and friends together,

bunnies, chicks, colored eggs

all these things herald new Life.

Seeking New Life is innate!!

Throughout these first four weeks

of this Easter Season of New Life*,

I continue to share my poetry and prayer

as reflections of life sought

by survivors of sexual violence

and their friends and families.

I am not a victim of this horror but have been honored

to walk with many who are.

Their anonymous stories are the grist of these prayers and poems.

I put them out to you as vehicles

of healing, hope, awareness and new life.

You can find these thoughts as the heart of The Prayerful Peacock

on the Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays of this April.

Please share with anyone who is searching for words akin to mine.

[If reprinting, kindly remember to cite this author.]

 

A Clean canvas

God–hear this now:

I want to paint my life over,

like a room pleading for fresh color,

like a clean canvas that begs a story.

I covet the ability to believe I have moved on;

that this furnace of abuse is burnt out,

and I have finally escaped its searing flames.

I boldly proclaim

“I am a survivor—this will not happen any more on my watch…”

Yet the cycle of horror wins once again

as my spouse’s tales of incest and dalliance

relight the fires of fear and betrayal,

nauseating my gut and trembling my knees

to discover his father was abused,

and he was abused

and he perpetrates this abuse

like a virus without cure…

Is there anyone who is not sucked into this hateful horror?

And why me?

Do I wear my past on my clothing,

like a gaudy jewel, and ugly stain?

Do I smell like so much garbage?

God–hear this now:

It must end.

I demand a fresh start,

an empty page,

newly painted walls,

a clean canvas.

©Nancie Chmielewski updated 4/6/15

* April is set aside as a month of Sexual Abuse Awareness.

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